Voices    (poem for Zac)

I try to hear my thinking
Among the noisy mad crowds

Between the chaotic life movies
That leave my mind swimming round

What am I thinking anyway
Just confused mixed up useless thoughts

They come and go like 4 x 4 killers
Or a beautiful white horse

Though often thoughts of clarity
Will jump up from inside

Like a float held down in water, then released
Intuition told me that he died

I already knew what they would tell me
I knew what they were about to say

What I cant remember is..
Did I know before
Or after it was too late

 

 

by AnneMarie Foley

(April 2009)

 

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15 thoughts on “

  1. Hi AnneMarie, thank you for putting your poem online. Like the words of a song, poetry can trigger alot of emotion that effects everyone in a personal way. i felt butterflies when i read your words because they described to me the true reality of loss and the journey you have to go through after. It just makes you think …

    Liked by 2 people

  2. Thanks for sharing it with us anyway. You are the only one who REALLY knew him and actually we all should hide us with our poetically effusions. Maybe it seems really strange for you to read our poems about your brother. But maybe it is also interesting or even helpful for you having this mixture of reality and phantasie perceptions.
    Concerning the last two verses of your poem: I can feel a certain kind of self-reproaches. Is it this way?

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Yes, I do feel guilty, thinking I could have done more to help him, or thinking if only he did`t go out that night, i suppose its easy to look back in hindsight and think what you could have done differently. There`s always that big “If only ” 😦

      Liked by 2 people

      1. I do understand what you feel, guilty. And there’s just “if” forever. Even us, his fans feel such way like this. Though, he must be lucky how you feel, and we feel and confess in various ways, poems, drawings, and songs, he sees all about us, and feel comfortable I believe…

        Liked by 1 person

      2. If there is anyone at all to blame , then those who seduced/sold him this stuff. Nevertheless I can understand your feelings. I guess I would not feel different. It is the normal feeling of loving people.

        Liked by 2 people

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